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waist, or if the color of a lovely slip would show through the material of a dress. A dream come true! I choked and swallowed on my ex- citement.

I vividly remember walking through dress shops and department stores with my mother and sisters, seeing them fondle intimate gar- ments, exclaiming over this cute dress, or that frilly blouse. How I envied them. As a boy, any enjoyment of pretty things was verboten. Any wish, even, to stroke silky fabrics or fingering exquisite laces, or, even more, to year for bright colors which might be contained in a flowered gown, had to be denied and suppressed, held in check and hidden as it would not fit the stereotype of my masculine image.

Living with my mother and two sisters, I fought against my fantasy of dressing in dainty garments, of letting my hair grow to flow down my back in girlish ringlets, of wearing ruffles and bows, so that I would attract and charm others, to be loved and cared for by them.

Perhaps some of my ardent desire leaked out because my sisters would tease and taunt me. "Don't you wish that you could wear pretty things, but you can't; you'd look silly, and you can't because you're nothing but a boy..."

I would remain stoney-faced, expressing contempt and scorn at such sissy things. Only girls, only sissies, wear laces and ribbons, dress in soft, gentle fabrics designed into pretty frocks and gowns that pleasure the senses. Instead, I wore rough clothes and hiking boots as I roamed the countryside, trying to be big and tough and strong to meet the demands made on me.

Yet, my dreams could not be denied, and I quivered at the thought of ruffled panties pulled up over my hips, with a waist cincher shap- ing my body, together with a lacy padded bra to give me sweet curves. Then a cool slip would caress my body, tickle my knees and cover my bra with dainty embroidery. Before I slipped on my filmy dress, I would pull on sheer hose and fit my feet into the feminine straps of high-heeled sandals. Casually tossed curls would frame my made-up face, and I would be prettier and more feminine than they

were.

But... I found myself back in the present and reality as I held the dress up and adored the thought of wearing it. I didn't even know

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